Tag Archives: wheat allergy
My Dearest Baby,
I’m sorry. Mommy failed you on Saturday. It is my duty to protect you, to keep you safe. I failed. You were having such a wonderful day! We started of course with the strawberry patch that morning. And you were excited that evening because we were on our way to a party that where you would see your friends, Micah and Miles. And you were having a ball! Until I didn’t think and gave you a few party meatballs. Forgetting, while talking and catching up with old friends, that some meatballs use wheat as a filler. And you my precious, are allergic to wheat. It wasn’t until you started coughing and told me that you didn’t feel so well that I knew. Luckily, we were surrounded by a house full of mothers who are also nurses who all quickly went into crisis mode to correct my mistake. I’m sorry I had to give you the dreaded epi pen. And I’m sorry that you had to ride in the ambulance to the hospital.
When finally, the night was over and we arrived home exhausted, I held you while you went to sleep. Just that once, because you are a big boy and don’t need me to anymore. But that night, I needed it. As you were drifting off to sleep, I said, Mommy is so sorry I gave you the meatballs and that you got sick. You lay your hand on my cheek and said: that’s OK Mommy, I’m alright.
And I cried. I cried because of the stress of the day, I cried because you were alright, and I cried because you still loved me the same, in spite of my wrongs.
This post was a part of a Blog circle that I participate in from Clickin Moms. Please follow our circle and check out the next letter from Erin of Kingsburg, CA Photographer | Erin Pasillas Photography.
First, let me start by saying thank you for all of the thoughts and kind words. I appreciate it.
And Pookah recovered quickly. The photo above was taken on Saturday, 2 days after the “incident”. He ran all day. And didn’t complain once. I had to force him to take breaks. He did need several breathing treatments but that was to be expected. But he’s doing fine.
It took a week for me to get some type of satisfaction from the “incident” as I have started to call it.
The day after, I had to return Pookah to school. Not by choice. But by necessity . I don’t have emergency backup childcare. And all friends, relatives, godmother’s anyone I could have trusted him with, they were all working or out of town.
That day, I was HOT, MAD. And so sad for my boy. But he was eager to go to school. Eager for show and share that happens every Friday. And after the horrible day he had had the day before, I just wanted him to have some happiness.
So I took him to school. I took him back to the place that had almost taken him away from me. The place that caused him to get stitches in his leg.
And most of the staff was falling over themselves to apologize.
But I was on a mission.
And I started with the teacher who gave him the pancake.
She didn’t know. She didn’t know he was allergic to anything. She just assumed that he never ate breakfast because he was full. NOT because he was allergic to anything. But she apologized. Profusely. Over and over.
I appreciated that.
But I had bigger fish to fry. Because the problem as I saw it was not that he got the pancake. The problem was that there was no safety measure in place to make sure that this didn’t happen.
Armed with that info, I went to the nurse. Gave her the new epi pen( that cost me $249 WITH insurance) and sat to wait for the Director to get in. And talked with one of my sources( read a gossip) who told me ALL about what happened that day.
And it wasn’t pretty. The mystery of the “scratch” as everyone kept calling it was solved. Seems there were three people holding him down to get in the epi pen and someone’s cheap ass ring scratched him. I’ve seen the teacher and the ring. We discussed. And that’s all I’m going to say about that. Also, I learned that no one knew their head from their ass as my child sat there for 2 hours struggling to breath before they figure out that he had a pancake.
Finally I had to go get dressed for work, but I stopped back by Pookah’s school to drop off Benadryl and who should I see but the Director. She sashays over, lays a condescending hand on my arm and says, “we’re so sorry this happened. And I hope his scratch is better. I would love to meet with you but I’m in a meeting right now.”
I shook off her hand and told her that “scratches” didn’t need stitches and here ( handing her the epi-pen bill and the ER bill) call me today. My number is in his file.
And I walked away.
Because I had to work. I’m still on my 3 month probation. SMH
She didn’t call.
She didn’t call that day, or Monday. Finally Tuesday morning, I called and spoke with her administrative assistant and basically told her that Boo, your boss needs to call me because you all almost killed my child and me and my Lawyer are starting to feel like you don’t care. I’m available after my meeting. Call me.
She called during my meeting and left a condescending message and said she hoped everything was resolved now and she would be back on Thursday.
That day, I went on a search for HER boss. The school has a board of directors. Did they know?
Of course they didn’t, but I was happy to inform them.
Amazing how I got that call from the Director on Thursday.
I think, she was getting her ducks in a row. She was planning, plotting, trying to have a plan for me. But like I told her, that’s all I needed you to do, was to TELL me you were working on it. To tell me that you had a revised plan going forward and what that plan was. I’m happy that you’ve got all of these committees and safeguards and revised plans of actions. Oh and that call to the state you say you need to make? Don’t worry, I got you! Already did that for you.
In the end, she and I came to an agreement. Financially and a plan for Pookah.
It works. For now.
A lot of people have told me that they would have removed Pookah from the school immediately. And while that was my first inclination( and still is if I’m honest) I had to look at the big picture. In this last week, I have searched and searched for a daycare near our house, near my job, near Cdub’s job. Either they aren’t teaching anything, they are way too expensive, or the food situation is worse than what we’ve got. In other words, the devil I know verses the devil I don’t .I’ve searched for nannies( so far out of my price range it isn’t funny) shared nannies( again, out of my price range), and even thought about COULD I stay at home? Could we afford it? No, No. NO.
We are not that fortunate. And we’re still recovering from when both of us got laid off in the same year as Pookah was born. And honestly, it’s not something I ever wanted to do. Never even thought of.
All in all, I’ve been pleased with his teachers, his happiness at this school( especially in relation to the last one) and what he’s been learning. He loves his teachers. He loves his friends. And honestly, they love him too, judging by the crying and carrying on I’ve had to sit through with them this past week. There is just the big overpowering fact that my child needed an epi pen in their care. Because of their carelessness, foolishness. Because they weren’t prepared.
But they are now.
So there is no perfect solution right now. I’m not giving up on looking into another daycare, or even looking for a nanny share. I’m even looking into what it would take for me to be able to stay home with him for the next year until we can get him into a preschool.
I hate that my hands are tied, but this is life right now.
We’ll just have to deal.
How was your weekend?
Mine WAS going so stellar around here. I mean, it was warm, we went to the park, I unpacked a few boxes, I didn’t argue with CDub. It was going SO well.
Somehow we ended it like this.
Yep. We went out to have dinner at Gladys Chicken and Waffles restaurant near the house. We had explored our new mall and decided to just stay and have dinner. Now, we had eaten there before, and Pookah was just fine. But last night I decided he should try the baked chicken and fries.
I don’t know what was on it, I don’t know if Pookah accidently got my fork with a few crumbs of waffle on it when he ate my sausage. He ate all of the chicken and refused the fries. And had half of CDub’s eggs and all of my sausage.
No wheat to my knowledge But on the way home, he coughed. And coughed again and again and again. And I knew. I think I knew before we even left the parking lot.
By the time we got home, I gave him some water, but he couldn’t sit still, he was breathing hard, he kept coughing. I gave him Benadryl. His nose started running. By the time he started to wheeze, we were already on our way to the Children’s hospital.
That was the longest 24 minute car ride of my life.
I could literally see my child getting tired of struggling, and fighting for air.
I kept telling him stay calm. And I knew it was bad when he stopped playing the computer game to tell me” Mommy I don’t feel so good.”
By the time we got to the ER you could hear him wheezing before you saw him.
The staff thought I was crazy until they heard him struggling.
We were rushed back where he got a breathing treatment, three doses of steroids AND a epi shot before he was OK.
He was SO swollen. Even his feet.
They sent us home three hours later with a toddler hyped up on steroids albuterol and epinephrine.
It was a hard, he talked for 4 hours straight.
He finally passed out around midnight.
I got in the bed, after checking on him for the 100th time and just cried.
Will this ever get easier? I feel like I can’t take him anywhere sometimes. Because what is SUPPOSED to be safe, wasn’t.
Well, of course, I had to call out today from work because we had to go to followup appointments I asked CDub what he thought about me being a stay at home mom. Just in case.
Anyhoo, as soon as this boy goes down for a nap( helped by the benadryl he’s getting around the clock for the next two days, ) I’m passing out too.
Because of course, I got up like five times last night to check on him and see if he was still breathing.
That is all.
Sometimes, I just don’t want to cook. But finding a good place where Pookah can stick to his gluten free/wheat free diet can be a challenge. Since Pookah is allergic to wheat, what should be spontaneous trips to eat out turn into planning and research sessions and making sure I have the epi pen just in case. But over the last year, we’ve found a few places that are sure fire places that have gluten free/wheat free menu items. And one of those places is….
The Golden Corral.
Yes, I know this place is better known for the overeating that goes on there, but if you are not into overeating, you CAN find healthy things to eat there. We like to think of it as variety! Just seeing the eating carnage that goes on at tables right next to you is enough to make you have one plate. And more importantly, we can find things that fall into the gluten free/wheat free category for Pookah to eat there.
When we go out to restuarants, I have already looked at the website for any nutritional/allergen info. Luckily, Golden Corral provides just that. If the item has wheat in it, it’s listed. Right next to it. Pookah can eat the baked chicken, the rotisserie chicken, the baked fish, the grilled steak and almost all the fruits and veggies.
As with any restaurant, I stay away from menu items with sauces because most of them contain some form of wheat. Like the teriyaki steak I had. If you didn’t know, most teriyaki sauces have soy sauce as an ingredient. Soy sauce contains wheat.
Wheat=anaphylaxis for my child.
Anyhoo. We ventured out to Golden Corral. Pookah had fries, baked chicken, a taste of my brocolli, a bowel of peaches and vanilla ice cream for dessert.
And since he is under 3( until November) he ate free!
I always get a salad, the grilled steak and a baked potato.
CDub is on a diet. A low carb one. So he ate well too.
So basically, it was a win win for everyone.
One last thing. I KNOW that some items there can be crossed contaminated. But that would be true anywhere. The important thing is to be aware. And to carry Bendryl and the epi pen with you JUST IN CASE!
I’ll be back next month with another restaurant where we frequently find gluten free/wheat free items for Pookah to eat.
Notice: I was NOT paid by Golden Coral for this review. AS IF! I just thought it was worth mentioning as a place we go to to feed a person who needs/follows a gluten free lifestyle.